‘Obsessed’ (2009) — movie review

Who’s in it?: Idris Elba (Takers, The Losers), Beyonce Knowles, Ali Larter (Final Destination, TV’s Heroes)

What a fucking mistake.  Not because the movie was bad, which it definitely was; but because of Sharon.  God damn Sharon.  Sharon is the character played by Beyonce.  Sharon is the wife of the guy that played Charles on The Office.  Sharon’s name is said almost literally ever 14.7 seconds in this God damned movie.  In fact, he says Sharon, every time he addresses Sharon.  He even says Sharon in scenes that Sharon wasn’t in just to remind you that Sharon was his wife and he loved Sharon.  Sharon.  Sharon.  Sharon.

Fucking Sharon.

So, the movie?  Let me just say this: Obsessed is fucking stupid.  Dumb white chick gets new job as temp.  She thinks her black boss is sexy so she starts throwing her shit around like a cat in heat but Charles from The Office doesn’t take the bait.  So crazy bitch starts going crazy and doing all kinds of crazy shit.  Of course she makes it look like they’re having an affair and I think at one point she says he raped her.  Then later she breaks in while they’re out, out-dumbs their baby sitter and leaves lip stick marks all over their baby.

The best part is when Sharon gets sick of the crazy white bitch and she throws down a serious fucking beat down on Ali Larter.  It won best fight at the MTV movie awards last year or this year or some shit, I can’t remember.  But it shouldn’t have.  It wasn’t that great of a fight.  Even I was sick of crazy white bitches after this one.  Don’t see it.  don’t watch it.

Would I recommend this movie?: No, Sharon, I wouldn’t.